My brilliant, marvellous, excellent and very artistic and meaningful paintings that discuss the major issues of our day, as based on other paintings

Here are a selection of paintings that are worth a lot of money. Oh, and they’re very artistic. Taking inspiration from them, I enrolled on a 5 minute Google art course and then proceeded to make my own masterpieces in the same amount of time. If you wish to buy them please leave a comment. Offers exceeding £80 million only please.

Here is Jackson Pollock’s very deep and meaningful painting ‘Number 5’ (1948):

I like the deep and meaningful meaning behind this painting. I like how the colours say ‘chaos’ and how the yellow makes the red and grey more ambiguous. I also like how the scribbles illustrate antiestablishmentarianism and the sharp divisions between conservative and socialist. This is powerful. This is amazing.
(Image source: http://likeafieldmouse.com/post/14686488171/jackson-pollock-no-5)

Here is Mark Rothko’s ‘Orange, Red, Yellow’ (1961):

This says a lot about the state of Wales and Scotland. It lets us know that the tensions can also have a mellow element, and that the orange contrasts with the red and yellow to make us realise how different the colours are. In turn, they also show us the contrast between socialist and conservative.

Here is Damien Hirst’s ‘The Physical Impossibility of Death in the Mind of Someone Living’ (1991):

I like how the shark demonstrates suspension in a box.

And finally, here is Barnett Newman’s ‘Onement VI’ (1953):

I like how the blue symbolises a love affair between the ink and the page, between conservatism and conservatism, and socialism and socialism. How it reunites the colours of navy and grey-blue. How it has a divide, most likely socio-economic, describing the differences in the animal and plant worlds. It is marvellous. It is artistic.

(Image source: http://www.theguardian.com/artanddesign/jonathanjonesblog/2013/may/16/barnett-newman-sublime-bargain-price)

Now, here are mine:

Gare de la mer (2013):

I will not tell you the meaning as it is a secret.

Next is my genius piece of work ‘They called me “Genius”, and I looked at them in astonishment’ (2013):

The secret is safe.

Next is my piece, ‘Bubbles of Pop Cider: Representations of Fun in Youth’ (2013):

Yes, my artistic qualification is great and supreme, perhaps.

Finally, this is my piece entitled ‘Blue Pink Orange Line’:

Yes, it is beautiful.

So there you go. That’s art.